Prom Nights from Hell Chapter Four

Poor Sheeb, still locked in half(a)-hu human race form, Jezebel teased. I remember how good e very social function spirits all the date. Ugh. And the temperature Do the reality collect to looseze forevery slenderizeg with their wretched air-conditioning?Shebas casing was smooth n atomic number 53, controlled. I overreach by. Theres plenty of misery to go close to.Thats the spirit Just an separate a few(prenominal) centuries, and youll be in the monolithic- clock with me.Sheba allowed a smirk to curl her lips. Or maybe non quite so long.One erosive shopping centrebrow arched high once morest Jezebels white forehead, raising almost to an ebony horn.Is that so? Got something discovericularly evil up your sleeve, little sister?Sheba didnt answer, tensing once again as Jezebel sent her call for thoughts snaking invisibly through the crowd inside the ballroom. Sheba locked her jaw, ready to strike derriere if Jezebel tried to undo both of her schemes. al unmatchable Jezebel conscionable computeed, touching nothing.Hmm, Jezebel hummed to herself. Hmm.Shebas fists clenched hard as Jezebels search touched Cooper Silverdale, unless(prenominal) again, Jezebel that observed.Well, well, the horned monsteress murmured. Wow. Sheeb, Ive got to say it, Im impressed. You got a gun in. And a motivated hand- luxuriant of alcohol to weaken his free allow The dodderinger terasess s cubic centimeterd with something that get a lineed strangely wish well sincerity. This is really evil. I humble, sure, a middle demon working homicide or mayhem or maybe riots could set something exchangeable this up at a amble, but a human-form child on misery detail? What be you, cardinal, three hundred?Just genius-eighty-six at my belong spawn day, Sheba answered brusquely, still wary.Jezebel whistled a tongue of flame through her lips. genuinely impressed. And I butt joint agree that you atomic number 18nt neglecting your assignment, either. Thats one miser able crowd in on that point. Jezebel laughed. Youve nullifyed nearly every promising relationship, low-down a few dozen lifelong friendships, do new enemies three, four, five fights brewing, Jezebel counted, her mind with the humans. Youve rase got the DJ audience to you Such attention to detail. Ha-ha I john count on one hand the humans who arent completely wretched.Sheba smiled grimly. Ill get to to them.Ghastly, Sheeb. Seriously nasty. You do our name proud. If every prom had a demoness wish well you involved, wed own this world.Aw, Jez, youre fashioning me blush, Sheba utter with heavy sarcasm.Jezebel laughed. Of course, youve got a little help.Jezebels thoughts twisted in a circle about Celeste, who had just twisted herself around a new boy. Jilted girls cried, while the boys Celeste carelessly tossed aside flexed their fists and glowered wrathfully at their competition burning with lust, each was determined that Celeste was finishing the night with him.Celeste wa s doing half the work tonight.I use the tools available to me, Sheba said.What an ironic name What an evil mind Is she fully human?I passed her in the hall, just to check, Sheba admitted. Pure, clean human scent. Revolting.Huh. I would stick out sworn she had some demon in her ancestry. entire chance on. exclusively, Sheba, asking a date? Pretty amateur, involving yourself physically that way.Shebas chin jabbed upward defensively, but she did not answer. Jezebel was salutary it was crude and time-consuming to use ones human form rather than ones demon mind. However, it was the results that counted. Shebas timely interference had kept Logan from discoering his true love.Well, it in no way diminishes your accomplishments here tonight. Jezebels tone was conciliatory. You pull this one move out, and theyll put you in the baby demons textbooks. give thanks, Sheba snapped. Did Jezebel really think she could flatter Sheba into letting her guard vanquish?Jezebel smiled, and her mis ts curled up on the edges, mirroring the expression.A tip, Sheba. Keep them conf apply in on that point. If you tidy sum get Cooper to pull the trigger, then you ability addle some of these wannabe gangsters think theyre under fire. Jezebel shook her head in wonder. Youve got so often(prenominal) potential mayhem here. Of course, theyll bring in a riot demon if it really gets hot but youd still get some of the credit for stirring it up.Sheba grimaced, and glimmers of red flashed at her ears. What was Jezebel doing? Where was the trick? Her mind ran over and over the humans she was assigned to torment, but she could find no trace of Jezebels distinct brimstone sea tangle in the ballroom. There was nothing but the misery Sheba had caused herself, and the few little pockets of repellent happiness that Sheba would assist to shortly.Youre certainly helpful tonight, Sheba said, creation deliberately insulting.Jezebel sighed, and there was something nigh the way her mists rolled stern in on themselves that made her look embarrassed. For the first time, Sheba felt a hint of doubt some her assumptions. neertheless Jezebels motives had to be malicious. Thats the still pleasant of motives demons had.With a rueful expression on her face, Jezebel asked quietly, Is it so impossible to conceptualise that I might regard you to get promoted?Yes.Jezebel sighed again. And again, the way her mists writhed in chagrin made Sheba uncertain.why? Sheba demanded. What do you get out of this?I know its all wrong-or rather right-for me to be giving you advice you nates work with. not very evil of me.Sheba nodded cautiously.Its in our nature to trip up everyone, demons, humans- level stumble angels if we get the chance. Were evil. of course were passing to vertebral columnstab, whether it hurts our side or not. We wouldnt be demons if we didnt let envy, greed, lust, and wrath rule us. Jezebel chuckled. I remember-how many another(prenominal) age ago was it? Lil ith almost got you booted back a few grades, didnt she?Red fire smoldered in Shebas look at the memory. Almost.You handled it better than most. Youre one of the very worst working misery right now, you know.Flattery again? Sheba stiffened.Jezebel twisted her mists up with a finger, and then circled that finger so that the mists drew a smoky roll against the night sky.Theres a bigger picture, though, Sheba. Demons wish Lilith cant feel past the evil at hand. alone theres a whole world out there, full of humans making millions of decisions every minute of the day and night. We can only be there to sway a fraction of those decisions. And sometimes, well, from where Im standing, it feels analogous the angels are getting nominal headwards provided, Jezebel Sheba gasped, shock breaking through her suspicion. Were winning. Just watch the intelligence information-its obvious were winning.I know, I know. But still with all the wars and destruction its odd, Sheba. Theres still an aw ful lot of happiness out there. For every mugging I distort into a homicide, across town some angel has a bystander jumping another mugger to continue the day. Or convincing the mugger to give up his wicked ways Ugh. Were losing ground.But the angels are weak, Jezebel. Everyone knows that. Theyre so full of love that they cant concentrate. Half the time the stupid birdb rainwaters fall in love with a human and administer their wings for a human body. Though why hitherto an idiot angel would exigency this Sheba scowled down the length of her human form. So limiting. Ive never really understood the point of having to wear these around for half a millennium. I guess its probably just to torture us, isnt it? The dark lords must enjoy reflexion us squirm.Its more than that. Its to make you really hatred them. The humans, I mean.Sheba stared at her. Why would I deficiency a suit? Hate is what I do.It happens, you know, Jezebel said slowly. The angels arent the only ones to give it all up. There are demons whove traded their horns for a human. nary(prenominal) Shebas eye widened, then nailed in disbelief. Youre exaggerating. Now and then a demon shacks up with a human, but its just to torment them. Just a bit of malicious fun.Jezebel winced, swishing her mists into check eights, but she didnt argue back. Thats what made Sheba realize she was serious.Sheba swallowed hard. Wow.She couldnt imagine that. Taking all this delicious evil and throwing it away. large-minded up a hard-earned pair of horns-horns that Sheba would destroy anything to lead right now-and getting stuck with a weak, fully virulent body in return.Sheba eyed Jezebels g audience onyx horns and frowned. I dont understand how anyone could do that.Remember what you said about the angels? Getting distracted by love? Jezebel asked. Well, hate can be a distraction, too. Look at Lilith and her spiteful good deeds. Maybe it starts out with sticking it to the lesser demons, but who knows where it go away lead? sexual abstention corrupts.I cant believe a few tricks against another demon could make you as stupid as a birdbrain, Sheba mumbled under her breath.Sheba, dont underestimate the angels, Jezebel chastised. You dont mess with them-you observe? Even a strong middle demon like me knows better than to lock horns with the feather-backs. They steer fall of us, and we steer clear of them. Let the Demon Lords conduct with the angels.I know that, Jezebel. I wasnt spawned this decade.Sorry. Im being helpful again. She shuddered. I just get so prevent sometimes smashingness and fallible on every sideSheba shook her head. I dont search that. disappointment is everywhere.Happiness is, too, sis. Its all over the place, Jezebel said sadly.It was silent for a long moment as Jezebels wrangle lingered in the air. The sticky breeze washed across Shebas skin. Miami was no hell, but it was comfortable at least.not at my prom Sheba retorted with sudden fierceness.Jezebel smiled wi dely-her teeth were black as the night sky. Thats just it-thats why Im being so un-damnedly helpful. Because we need demonesses like you out there. We need the worst we can get on the front lines. Let the Liliths of the underworld mess around with petty tricks. Get me the Shebas on my side. Get me a honey oil Shebas. Well win this fight once and for all.Sheba considered that for a moment, weighing the fierce purpose in Jezebels enunciate. Thats evil in such a strange way. It almost survives like good.Twisted, I know.They laughed unneurotic for the first time.Well, get back in there and destroy that prom.Im on it. Go to hell, Jezebel.Prom Nights from hellhole Chapter FourSibby Cumean started prateing as soon as they got out of the airdrome.How long have you been driving betray around? she asked Miranda.A year.Did you commence up here?No.Do you have any brothers?No.Any sisters?N-no.Do you like driving?Yes.Do you have to wear that deadening black instance?Yes.How old are yo u?Twenty.Um, not.Fine. Eighteen. gift you ever had sex?Miranda cleared her throat. I dont think that question is appropriate. She hear herself earphone like Dr. Trope, the confederate head of domesticate, with the voice he used to set up her he wasnt auditory sense to another excuse about why she was late getting back to campus, rules were made for a reason and that reason wasnt so she could inspire them for her amusement and speaking of late, did she plan at some point to influence what she was outlet to do near year or just irresponsibly forfeit her place at the several top-tier colleges shed been accepted to, making the school look bad and herself look worse and really he didnt know what had gotten into her recently, where was the Miranda Kiss who was going to be a doctor and save the world, who was a credit to the school and herself, rather than the one who was on her way to being expelled-is that what you really want, young lady? A voice she knew well since she realise med to have been auditory modality it at least once a week since early November.Youre a virgin, Sibby announced, like she was confirming a sad fact shed long suspected.Thats not-Do you at least have a boyfriend?Not at this-A girlfriend?No.Do you have any friends? Youre not really very good at conversation.Miranda was beginning to understand why the girls relatives hadnt come to the airport for her.I have dozens of friends.Sure. I believe you. What do you do for fun?Answer questions. interest never try to be funny again. Sibby leaned forward. Have you ever thought of wearing some black eyeliner? It would be an improvement.B complaisant give thankss. dismiss you pull up?Um, were at a take leavelight.Just go forward a fiddling-perfect. feeling in the side mirror, Miranda saw that Sibby had rolled down her window and was propensity out, saying now to the computerized axial tomographys in the jeep next to them, Where are you boys going?The guys answered, A little synodic month su rfing. Want to come, goddess?Im not a goddess. Do you think I look like one?I cant tell. Maybe if you take off your shirt.Maybe if you give me a snog.Miranda hit the button to roll up the window.What are you doing? Sibby demanded. You could have broken my hand.Put your lav belt on, please.Put your seat belt on, please, Sibby mimicked, slumping back into the seat. Oh my gods, I was just hard to be sociable.Until we get to your destination, no more socializing.Have you listened to yourself recently? You sound like youre eighty, not eighteen. She scowled at Miranda in the mirror. I thought you were a driver, not a jailer.Its my commerce to make sure you get where youre going in a riskless and timely manner. Thats printed on the visor youll find in your seat pocket, by the way.How is kiss some boys going to make me unsafe?A million polar ways. What if they have an invisible babble fungus? Or DeathLip.Theres no such thing as DeathLip. ar you sure?Youre just jealous because I kn ow how to have fun and you dont. Virgin.Miranda rolled her eyeball but kept quiet, listening to cell retrieve conversations from the cars basis them, a woman state psyche that the gardener was on his way, a guy saying in a mystical voice, I see a mysterious rum access for you, I cant quite tell if its a man or a woman. Another man talking to someone about how he wanted to take that kicking out of the will and it didnt involvement if she was his mothers favorite dog-She was interrupted suddenly by Sibby shouting, Inn-Out Burger We have to stop.B suitMiranda agreed to let Sibby shape her own at the drive-through, then regretted it when she heard the girl saying to the guy taking the order, Do I get a discount if I let you kiss me?Okay, seriously, were you increase on Crazycake? Why do you want to kiss all these guys you dont even know? Miranda asked.There arent that many boys where I come from. And what does learned them have to do with it? Kissing is great. I kissed four boys on the airplane. Im hoping to make it twenty-five before the end of the day.She added the two working the drive-through lane when she got her burger.Are all hamburgers that delicious? she asked when they were on the road again.Miranda glanced at her in the rearview mirror. Youve never had a burger before? Where do you live?The mountains, Sibby answered quickly, and Miranda picked up a slight rise in her softheartedness rate, suggesting that she was lying and not used to it. Which faceed hugely unlikely-the not-used-to-it part-for someone who had a case of acute son Crazy like this girl. Her parents couldnt possibly let her run around-Oh So Very Much Not Your Problem, Miranda reminded herself. B discreet.Sibby tried to solicit kisses from four other guys as they drove. They were a mile from the drop-off point and Miranda was sentiment that the ride could not be over soon enough when Sibby shrieked, Oh my gods, a doughnut store Ive always wanted to try doughnuts, too. Can we stop? Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?They were already almost an hour late but Miranda couldnt abandon anyone a doughnut. Even someone who said, Oh my gods. But pulling in, she saw a group of guys sitting at a table inside and find outd that it would be dangerous to let Sibby near them if she wanted to get out of there in under forty minutes. Ill go in and get them, you mollify here.Sibby had seen the guys, too. No way, Im coming in.Either your butt stays in the car, Kissing Bandit, or the doughnuts stay in the store.I dont think thats a nice way to talk to customers.Feel free to use my phone to file cabinet a complaint while Im inside. Do we have a deal?Fine. But will you at least roll down the window? Miranda hesitated. Sibby said, Look, Grandma, I promise Ill restrain my butt in the car, I just dont want to suffocate. Gods.When Miranda came out, Sibby had wedged herself in the window with her body and legs exterior the car and her rear intermission back into it, and was d eeply involved in kissing a redheaded guy.Excuse me, Miranda said, tapping the guy on the shoulder.He turned around shape of hazy, looked her up and down. pitfallo, dream girl. You want a kiss, too? I could do something really special with lips like yours. You wouldnt even have to collapse me a dollar.Thanks, but no. looking for at Sibby now. I thought wed agreed that- my butt would stay in the car. Where, if you bothered to look, you would see it is.Miranda turned away so Sibby wouldnt see her crack up.She handed Sibby the doughnuts and slid into the drivers seat. at one time Sibby had wiggled back through the window, Miranda caught her eye in the rearview. You were paying guys to kiss you?So what? Sibby glared. Not all of us can get kissed for free. much glaring, then, You barely have boobs. My boobs are bigger than yours. It makes no sense.Sibby got quiet, not even eating her doughnut. From time to time shed sigh dramatically.Miranda started feeling a little sorry. Maybe she had been acting like a grandma. She looked at How to Get-And Kiss-Your computed axial tomography on the seat next to her. Maybe youre jealous shes four geezerhood younger than you but has already kissed more guys in one day than youll probably date in your whole life even if you get a boob job and live to be two trillion.Shut up, U-Suck channel.She should be nice, make conversation. How many kisses is it total now?Sibby kept her eyes on her lap. Ten. Looking up to add, But I only paid six of them. And one of them I only gave a quarter.Nice work.Miranda saw Sibby look up suspiciously, like she thought she was being made fun of, decide she wasnt, and start picking at her doughnut. After a while she said, Can I ask you a question?Youre asking liberty now?For real, just please stop trying to be funny. Its painful.Thanks for the hot tip. Did you have a question or-Why didnt you want to kiss that boy back there? The one who wanted to kiss you?I guess hes not my part.Whats your ty pe?Miranda thought of Deputy Reynolds-blue eyes and cleft jaw and ungroomed blond copper, getting up every morning to go surfing. The openhearted of guy who always wore shades or looked at you with his eyes half closed and was too cool down for smiling. Then pictured go away with his dark, maple-syrup-color skin, short curly hair, huge boyish smile, and abs that rippled when he stood talking, shirtless, with the other players after lacrosse practice, body glimmer in the sun, his laugh ringing out and making her feel like she felt when she saw cover melting on perfectly cooked Belgian waffles.Not that she routinely jumped up onto the roof of the marine biota lab when no one was looking to watch this. (Weekly.)I dont know, its more a feeling than a type, Miranda said finally.How many boys have you kissed? A hundred?Uh, no. ii hundred?Miranda felt herself flush and hoped Sibby couldnt see. Keep guessing.They pulled up to the address shed been given, an hour and fifteen minutes afterwards than they should have, the first time shed ever dropped a client off late.When Miranda undetermined the car door for her, Sibby asked, Is kissing a boy whos your type really different than kissing just any boy?Its complicated. Miranda was surprise at how relieved she was that she wouldnt have to go into it more, admit to this girl that, genuinely, she had no idea.The place looked more like a government safe domicile for witnesses than a home, she thought, walking Sibby to the door. It was like the dictionary definition of nondescript, sandwiched surrounded by a house with carbon White and the Seven Dwarves enacting the Nativity on the front lawn on one side, and one with a pink-and-orange devolve set on the other. The only thing you noticed about this house was that there were thick curtains interruption in the front windows so you couldnt see in, and a six-foot-tall solid woodwind instrument fence blocking off the backyard so you couldnt get in. The street was fi lled with noises-Miranda heard BBQs sizzling, conversations, someone watching Beauty and the Beast in Spanish-but this house was silent, as though it had been soundproofed.She registered a low humming coming from the side, like an air conditioner but not quite. Glancing up, she saw that none of the power lines connected to this house. None of the phone lines, either. A generator. Whoever lived here was animated off the grid. All in all, the whole place was really informal, if cozy meant creepy and cultish.And the woman who opened the front door? Exactly what youd expect of someone creepy and cultish, Miranda thought. She had graying hair pulled back in a loose bun and was wearing a long skirt and kind of shapeless sweater. She could have been anyplace from thirty to sixty years old, it was impossible to tell because she was wearing a pair of huge bifocals with unflattering square frames that magnified her eyes and covered half her face. She looked completely harmless, like a sch oolteacher whod sanctified her life to caring for an aging relative and whose one indulgence was a secret crush on Mr. Rochester from Jane Eyre.Or almost like that. Like that was the look shed been going for. But there was something wrong, some tiny thing that did not quite match, one tiny detail that wasnt right.So. Not. Your. Business.Miranda said good-bye, took her $1.00 tip-Because you were really quite late, in effect(p)-and drove away.She was half a block away when she slammed on the brake system and sprinted back to the house.Prom Nights from Hell Chapter FourSibby Cumean started talking as soon as they got out of the airport.How long have you been driving people around? she asked Miranda.A year.Did you grow up here?No.Do you have any brothers?No.Any sisters?N-no.Do you like driving?Yes.Do you have to wear that boring black suit?Yes.How old are you?Twenty.Um, not.Fine. Eighteen.Have you ever had sex?Miranda cleared her throat. I dont think that question is appropriate. She heard herself sound like Dr. Trope, the assistant head of school, with the voice he used to tell her he wasnt listening to another excuse about why she was late getting back to campus, rules were made for a reason and that reason wasnt so she could flout them for her amusement and speaking of late, did she plan at some point to decide what she was going to do next year or just irresponsibly forfeit her place at the several top-tier colleges shed been accepted to, making the school look bad and herself look worse and really he didnt know what had gotten into her recently, where was the Miranda Kiss who was going to be a doctor and save the world, who was a credit to the school and herself, rather than the one who was on her way to being expelled-is that what you really want, young lady? A voice she knew well since she seemed to have been hearing it at least once a week since early November.Youre a virgin, Sibby announced, like she was confirming a sad fact shed long suspected.Thats not-Do you at least have a boyfriend?Not at this-A girlfriend?No.Do you have any friends? Youre not really very good at conversation.Miranda was beginning to understand why the girls relatives hadnt come to the airport for her.I have lots of friends.Sure. I believe you. What do you do for fun?Answer questions.Please never try to be funny again. Sibby leaned forward. Have you ever thought of wearing some black eyeliner? It would be an improvement.B polite Thanks.Can you pull up?Um, were at a stoplight.Just go forward a tiny-perfect.Looking in the side mirror, Miranda saw that Sibby had rolled down her window and was leaning out, saying now to the guys in the jeep next to them, Where are you boys going?The guys answered, A little moonlight surfing. Want to come, goddess?Im not a goddess. Do you think I look like one?I cant tell. Maybe if you take off your shirt.Maybe if you give me a kiss.Miranda hit the button to roll up the window.What are you doing? Sibby demanded. You could have b roken my hand.Put your seat belt on, please.Put your seat belt on, please, Sibby mimicked, slumping back into the seat. Oh my gods, I was just trying to be sociable.Until we get to your destination, no more socializing.Have you listened to yourself recently? You sound like youre eighty, not eighteen. She scowled at Miranda in the mirror. I thought you were a driver, not a jailer.Its my job to make sure you get where youre going in a safe and timely manner. Thats printed on the card youll find in your seat pocket, by the way.How is kissing some boys going to make me unsafe?A million different ways. What if they have an invisible mouth fungus? Or DeathLip.Theres no such thing as DeathLip.Are you sure?Youre just jealous because I know how to have fun and you dont. Virgin.Miranda rolled her eyes but kept quiet, listening to cell phone conversations from the cars behind them, a woman telling someone that the gardener was on his way, a guy saying in a mystical voice, I see a mysterious st ranger coming for you, I cant quite tell if its a man or a woman. Another man talking to someone about how he wanted to take that bitch out of the will and it didnt matter if she was his mothers favorite dog-She was interrupted suddenly by Sibby shouting, Inn-Out Burger We have to stop.B accommodatingMiranda agreed to let Sibby order her own at the drive-through, then regretted it when she heard the girl saying to the guy taking the order, Do I get a discount if I let you kiss me?Okay, seriously, were you raised on Crazycake? Why do you want to kiss all these guys you dont even know? Miranda asked.There arent that many boys where I come from. And what does knowing them have to do with it? Kissing is great. I kissed four boys on the airplane. Im hoping to make it twenty-five before the end of the day.She added the two working the drive-through lane when she got her burger.Are all hamburgers that delicious? she asked when they were on the road again.Miranda glanced at her in the rearv iew mirror. Youve never had a burger before? Where do you live?The mountains, Sibby answered quickly, and Miranda picked up a slight rise in her heart rate, suggesting that she was lying and not used to it. Which seemed hugely unlikely-the not-used-to-it part-for someone who had a case of acute Boy Crazy like this girl. Her parents couldnt possibly let her run around-Oh So Very Much Not Your Problem, Miranda reminded herself. B discreet.Sibby tried to solicit kisses from four other guys as they drove. They were a mile from the drop-off point and Miranda was thinking that the ride could not be over soon enough when Sibby shrieked, Oh my gods, a doughnut store Ive always wanted to try doughnuts, too. Can we stop? Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?They were already almost an hour late but Miranda couldnt deny anyone a doughnut. Even someone who said, Oh my gods. But pulling in, she saw a group of guys sitting at a table inside and decided that it would be dangerous to let Sibby near them if she wanted to get out of there in under forty minutes. Ill go in and get them, you stay here.Sibby had seen the guys, too. No way, Im coming in.Either your butt stays in the car, Kissing Bandit, or the doughnuts stay in the store.I dont think thats a nice way to talk to customers.Feel free to use my phone to file a complaint while Im inside. Do we have a deal?Fine. But will you at least roll down the window? Miranda hesitated. Sibby said, Look, Grandma, I promise Ill keep my butt in the car, I just dont want to suffocate. Gods.When Miranda came out, Sibby had wedged herself in the window with her body and legs outside the car and her rear hanging back into it, and was deeply involved in kissing a blond guy.Excuse me, Miranda said, tapping the guy on the shoulder.He turned around kind of hazy, looked her up and down. Hello, dream girl. You want a kiss, too? I could do something really special with lips like yours. You wouldnt even have to pay me a dollar.Thanks, but no. Looking at Sibby now. I thought wed agreed that- my butt would stay in the car. Where, if you bothered to look, you would see it is.Miranda turned away so Sibby wouldnt see her crack up.She handed Sibby the doughnuts and slid into the drivers seat. Once Sibby had wiggled back through the window, Miranda caught her eye in the rearview. You were paying guys to kiss you?So what? Sibby glared. Not all of us can get kissed for free. More glaring, then, You barely have boobs. My boobs are bigger than yours. It makes no sense.Sibby got quiet, not even eating her doughnut. From time to time shed sigh dramatically.Miranda started feeling a little sorry. Maybe she had been acting like a grandma. She looked at How to Get-And Kiss-Your Guy on the seat next to her. Maybe youre jealous shes four years younger than you but has already kissed more guys in one day than youll probably date in your whole life even if you get a boob job and live to be two trillion.Shut up, U-Suck channel.She should be nice, ma ke conversation. How many kisses is it total now?Sibby kept her eyes on her lap. Ten. Looking up to add, But I only paid six of them. And one of them I only gave a quarter.Nice work.Miranda saw Sibby look up suspiciously, like she thought she was being made fun of, decide she wasnt, and start picking at her doughnut. After a while she said, Can I ask you a question?Youre asking permission now?For real, just please stop trying to be funny. Its painful.Thanks for the hot tip. Did you have a question or-Why didnt you want to kiss that boy back there? The one who wanted to kiss you?I guess hes not my type.Whats your type?Miranda thought of Deputy Reynolds-blue eyes and cleft jaw and shaggy blond hair, getting up every morning to go surfing. The kind of guy who always wore sunglasses or looked at you with his eyes half closed and was too cool for smiling. Then pictured Will with his dark, maple-syrup-color skin, short curly hair, huge boyish smile, and abs that rippled when he stood talk ing, shirtless, with the other players after lacrosse practice, body glimmering in the sun, his laugh ringing out and making her feel like she felt when she saw butter melting on perfectly cooked Belgian waffles.Not that she routinely jumped up onto the roof of the marine biology lab when no one was looking to watch this. (Weekly.)I dont know, its more a feeling than a type, Miranda said finally.How many boys have you kissed? A hundred?Uh, no.Two hundred?Miranda felt herself blushing and hoped Sibby couldnt see. Keep guessing.They pulled up to the address shed been given, an hour and fifteen minutes later than they should have, the first time shed ever dropped a client off late.When Miranda opened the car door for her, Sibby asked, Is kissing a boy whos your type really different than kissing just any boy?Its complicated. Miranda was surprised at how relieved she was that she wouldnt have to go into it more, admit to this girl that, actually, she had no idea.The place looked more li ke a government safe house for witnesses than a home, she thought, walking Sibby to the door. It was like the dictionary definition of nondescript, sandwiched between a house with Snow White and the Seven Dwarves enacting the Nativity on the front lawn on one side, and one with a pink-and-orange swing set on the other. The only thing you noticed about this house was that there were thick curtains hanging in the front windows so you couldnt see in, and a six-foot-tall solid wood fence blocking off the backyard so you couldnt get in. The street was filled with noises-Miranda heard BBQs sizzling, conversations, someone watching Beauty and the Beast in Spanish-but this house was silent, as though it had been soundproofed.She registered a low humming coming from the side, like an air conditioner but not quite. Glancing up, she saw that none of the power lines connected to this house. None of the phone lines, either. A generator. Whoever lived here was living off the grid. All in all, the whole place was really cozy, if cozy meant creepy and cultish.And the woman who opened the front door? Exactly what youd expect of someone creepy and cultish, Miranda thought. She had graying hair pulled back in a loose bun and was wearing a long skirt and kind of shapeless sweater. She could have been anywhere from thirty to sixty years old, it was impossible to tell because she was wearing a pair of huge bifocals with unflattering square frames that magnified her eyes and covered half her face. She looked completely harmless, like a schoolteacher whod dedicated her life to caring for an aging relative and whose one indulgence was a secret crush on Mr. Rochester from Jane Eyre.Or almost like that. Like that was the look shed been going for. But there was something wrong, some tiny thing that did not quite match, one tiny detail that wasnt right.So. Not. Your. Business.Miranda said good-bye, took her $1.00 tip-Because you were really quite late, dear-and drove away.She was half a b lock away when she slammed on the brakes and sprinted back to the house.Prom Nights from Hell Chapter FourI laughed.But you girls go on, knock yourselves out, he said. Ive actually got an errand to run.Youre leaving? Yun Sun said.What about the pizza? I said.He opened his wallet and laid a twenty-dollar bill on the coffee table. Itll be here in thirty minutes. My treat.Yun Sun shook her head. And again I say Youre leaving?. Youre not even staying to eat?Theres something I need to do, he said.My heart constricted. I ached to keep him here, even if just for a little longer. I darted back to the kitchen and pulled Madame Zs corsage-no, my corsage-out of my bag.At least wait till Ive made my wish, I said.He looked amused. Fine, wish away.I hesitated. The den was warm and cozy, pizza was on the way, and I had the two greatest friends in the world. What else did I truly want?Duh, the grasping part of my brain told me. Prom, of course. I wanted Will to ask me to prom. Maybe it was selfish to have so much and still want more, but I pushed that line of reasoning away.Because look at him, I thought. Those kind brown eyes, that lopsided smile. Those ridiculously angelic curls. The entire sweetness and goodness that was Will.He hummed the Jeopardy content song. I raised the corsage.I wish for the boy I love to ask me to prom, I said.And there you have it, folks Will cried. He was far too euphoric. And what boy wouldnt want to take her to prom, our fab Frankie? Now well just have to wait and see, wont we, whether her wish will come-Yun Sun cut him off. Frankie? Are you alright?It travel, I said, cringing away from the corsage, which Id flung to the floor. My skin was clammy. I assert to God, it moved when I made the wish. And that belief Do you smell it?Noooo, she said. What smell?You smell it, Will. Dont you?He grinned, still on whatever high hed been on since well, since Madame Z warned him away from heights. A clap of thunder rumbled, and he shoved my shoulder.Next youre going to blame the act on the evil wish fairies, arent you? he said. Or, no Youre going to go to bed tonight, and tomorrow youll tell us you implant a hunched and skulking creature on your comforter, smiling a twisted smileLike rotting flowers, I said. You honestly dont smell it? Youre not playing with me?Will cut into his keys out of his pocket. See you on the flip side, homies. And, Frankie?What?Another boom of thunder shook the house.Dont give up hope, he said. Good things come to those who wait.I watched through the window as he dashed to his truck. The rain was coming down in sheets. Then I turned to Yun Sun, a balloony feeling pushing everything else away.Did you hear what he said? I grabbed her hands. Oh my God, do you think it means what I think it means?What else could it mean? Yun Sun said. Hes going to ask you to prom Hes just I dont know. Trying to make a big production out of itWhat do you think hes going to do?No idea. Hire a skywriter? get by a singing tele gram? I squealed. She squealed. We jumped about in a frenzy.Got to hand it to you, the wish thing was brilliant, she said. She flicked her finger to indicate giving Will the push he needed. And the rotting flowers? Verrrry dramatic.I honestly did smell it, though, I said.Ha-ha.I did.She looked at me and shook her head, amused. Then she looked at me again.Well, it must have been your imagination, she said.I guess, I said.I picked the corsage up off the floor, holding it gingerly between my thumb and forefinger. I took it to the bookshelf and dropped it behind a row of books, glad to have it out of sight.The next morning I trotted downstairs, hoping foolishly to find I dont know. Hundreds of M spelling out my name? Pink hearts sketched in silly imbibe on the windows?Instead, I found a dead bird. Its tiny body lay on the get mat, as if it had flown into the door during the storm and bashed its brains in.I scooped it up with a paper towel and tried not to feel its soft weight as I del ivered it to the outside trash bin.Im sorry, little bird, so fairly and sweet, I said. Fly to heaven. I dropped in the corpse, and the lid slammed shut with a bang.I returned inside to the sound of the ringing phone. Probably Yun Sun, wanting an update. Shed left with Jeremy at eleven last night, after making me swear to tell her the minute Will made his bold move.Hey, sweetie, I said, after glancing at the caller ID and see that, yep, I was right. No news yet-sorry.Frankie Yun Sun said.Ive been thinking about Madame Z, though. Her whole dont-mess-with-fate mumbo jumbo.Frankie-Because how could Will asking me to prom lead to anything bad? I walked to the freezer and grabbed a box of frozen waffles. Spits going to fly from his mouth and land on me? Hell bring me flowers, and a beell zip out and sting me?Frankie, stop. Didnt you watch the morning news?On a Saturday? I dont think so.Yun Sun made a gulping sound.Yun Sun, are you tears?Last night Will climbed the watertower, she said. What? The watertower was easily three hundred feet tall, with a sign at the bottom prohibiting anyone from ascending. Will always talked about climbing to the top, but he was such a rule-follower that he never had.And the railing must have been wet or maybe it was lightning, they dont yet knowYun Sun. What happened?He was atomizer painting something on the tower, the stupid idiot, and-Spray painting? Will?Frankie, will you shut up? He fell He fell off the watertowerI gripped the phone. Jesus. Is he okay?Yun Sun was unable to talk for sobbing. Which I understood, sure. Will was her friend, too. But I needed her to pull it together.Is he in the hospital? Can I go visit him? Yun SunThere was wailing, and then a shuffling sound. Mrs. Yomiko took over.Prom Nights from Hell Chapter FourYou dont understand. Lila tosses back her long blond hair. Hes not a tick, bloody shame. Sebastian loves me too much to bite me. But I know I can change his mind. Because he wants to be with me forever, as much as I want to be with him forever. I know it. And after tomorrow night, we will be together forever.Whats tomorrow night? Adam wants to know.The prom, I say woodenly.Right, Lila prattles on. Sebastians taking me. And though he doesnt know it yet, hes going to give in to me there. Just one bite and Ill have eternal life. Come on, you guys, how cool is that? Wouldnt you want to live forever? I mean, if you could?Not that way, I say. Something inside of me aches. Aches for Lila, and aches for all the girls whove gone before her. And will come after her, too, if I dont do something about it.Hes meeting you at the dance? I promote myself to ask her. Its hard to speak, because all I want to do is cry.Right, Lila says. Her face still has the same vacant expression she wore inside the club, as well as earlier today in the lunchroom. Hell never be able to resist me-not in my new Roberto Cavalli gown, with my neck all exposed beneath the silver light of the full moonI think Im going to throw up, Ted volunteers.No, youre not, I say. Youre going to take Lila home. Here. I reach into my satchel and pull out a crucifix and two containers of holy water, then hand them to him. If Drake shows up-although I dont think he will-throw these at him. Then get yourself home, after youve dropped off Lila.Ted looks down at what Ive shoved into his hands. Wait. Thats it? he wants to know. Were just going to let him kill her?Not kill, Lila corrects him cheerfully. Turn me. Into one of his kind.We arent going to do anything, I say. You guys are going to go home and leave this to me. Ive got it under control. Just make sure Lila gets back safely. She should be all right until the dance. Evil spirits cannot enter an inhabited house unless invited I narrow my eyes at Lila. You didnt invite him inside, did you?Whatever, Lila says, tossing her head. Like my dad wouldnt go too ballistic if he found a guy in my room.See? Go home. You, too, I add, to Adam.Ted takes Lila by the arm and begi ns to lead her away.But Adam, to my surprise, stays where he is, his hands buried deep in his pockets.Um, I say to him. Is there something I can do for you?Yes, Adam says calmly. You can start at the beginning. I want to know everything. Because if what youre telling me is true, if it werent for me, youd be a speck on the wall in the club back there. So start talking.AdamIf you had told me just an hour or two ago that Id be ending my evening with a trip to bloody shame-from-U.S.-History-classs penthouse apartment over in the East Seventies well, Id have told you that you were high.But thats exactly where I find myself, following Mary past her sleepy doorman (who doesnt raise so much as an eyebrow at her crossbow), and then up the elevator to her place, which is decorated in mid-nineteenth-century Victorian chic-at least as near as I can judge, considering all the furniture looks like it came out of one of those boring miniseries my mom likes to watch on PBS, featuring girls named Vi olet or Hortense or whatever.There are books everywhere-and not Dan brownness paperbacks, either, but big, heavy books, with titles like Demonology in Seventh-century Greece and A Guide to Necromancy. I look around, but I dont see a plasma screen or an LCD. Not even a regular TV.Are your parents professors or something? I ask Mary as she throws down the crossbow and heads to the kitchen, where she pulls open the fridge and reaches for two Cokes, one of which she hands to me.Something like that, Mary says. This is what shes been like the whole way to her place not exactly brimful with the explanations.Not that it matters, though, since I already told her Im not leaving until I get the whole story. The thing is, I really dont know what to think about all this so far. On the one hand, Im relieved Drake isnt who I thought he was-Marys ex-boyfriend. On the other hand a vampire?.Come on, Mary says, and I follow her because well, what else am I supposed to do? I dont know what Im doing h ere. I dont believe in vampires. I think Lilas just gotten herself involved with one of those freaky goth dudes I saw on Law & Order that one time.Although Marys question-Then how do you explain his disappearance from the dance floor into thin air like that? bugs me. How did the guy do that?Then again, there are tons of questions like that one that I dont have the answers for. Like this new one that occurred to me How can I get Mary to look at me the way Lila looked at that guy, Drake?Life is full of mysteries, as my dad likes to say, many of which are in any case wrapped up in enigmas.Mary leads me down a dark hallway toward a partly open door, from which light spills. She taps on the door, then says, Dad? Can we come in?A gruff voice says, By all means.And I follow Mary into the strangest room Ive ever seen. At least in a penthouse apartment on the Upper East Side.Its a laboratory. There are test tubes and beakers and vials everywhere. Standing in front of some of them is a t all, white-haired-professor type in a bathrobe, messing around with a concoction in a clear container thats bright green and vigorously generating large amounts of smoke. The old dude looks up from this and smiles as Mary comes into the room, his green-eyed gaze-a lot like Marys-darting toward me curiously.Well, hello, the guy says. I see youve brought a friend home. Im so glad. Ive been thinking lately that you spend far too much time alone, young lady.Dad, this is Adam, Mary says casually. He sits behind me in U.S. History. Were going to my room to do homework.How nice, Marys father says. It doesnt seem to occur to him that the last thing a guy my age is likely to be doing in a girls bedroom at two in the morning is homework. Dont study too hard, now, children.We wont, Mary says. Come on, Adam.Good night, sir, I say to Marys dad, who beams at me before turning back to his smoking beaker.Okay, I say to Mary as she leads me down the hall once more, this time to her room which is sur prisingly utilitarian for a girls bedroom, containing only a large bed, a dresser, and a desk. Unlike in Veronicas room, everything is put away, except for a laptop computer and an MP3 player. I take a quick look at Marys play list when shes busy foray around in the closet for something. Mostly rock, some R&B, and a little rap. No emo, though. Thank God. Whats going on? Whats your dad doing with all that stuff?Looking for a bring round, Mary says from the closet, her voice muffled.Ive moved across the ornate Persian carpet toward her bed. Theres a framed photo on her nightstand. Its of a handsome woman, squinting into the sunlight and smiling. Marys mother. I dont know how I know it. I just do.A bring around for what? I ask, picking up the photo for a closer look. Yep, there they are. Marys lips. Which, I havent been able to stop noticing, are kind of curled up at the ends. Even when shes mad.Vampirism, Mary says. She emerges from the closet holding a long red dress. Its wrappe d in clear plastic from the dry cleaners.Uh, I say, I hate to be the one to tell you this, Mary. But theres no such thing as vampires. Or vampirism. Or whatever it is.Oh yeah? The ends of Marys mouth are curled up even more than usual.Vampires were just made up by that guy. Shes laughing at me. I dont mind, though, because its Mary. Its better than her ignoring me, which is what shes done for most of the time Ive cognise her. That guy who wrote genus Dracula. Right?Bram Stoker did not make up vampires, Mary says, the smile vanishing. He didnt even make up Dracula. Whos an actual historical figure, by the way.Yeah, but a dude who drinks blood and can turn into a bat? Come on.Vampires exist, Adam, Mary says quietly. I like how she says my name. I like it so much that I dont even notice at first that shes staring at the photo Im holding. And so do their victims.I follow the direction of her gaze. And nearly drop the photo.Mary, I say. Because its all I can think of to say. Your your m om? Is she did sheShes still alive, Mary says, turning to throw the red dress, in its slippery clear plastic bag, onto the bed. If you can call it living, she adds, almost to herself.Mary I say in a different tone of voice. I cant believe it.And yet I do. Theres something in her face that makes it clear shes not lying. as well as something that makes me long to wrap her in my arms. Which Veronica would say is sexist. But there you go.I let go of the lip Ive started chewing. Is that why your dad-He wasnt always like that, she says, not looking at me. He used to be different, when Mom was here. He he thinks he can find a chemical cure for it. She sinks onto the bed beside the dress. He doesnt want to believe that theres only one way to get her back. And thats killing the vampire who made her into one.Drake, I say, sinking down onto the bed beside her. It all makes sense now. I guess.No, Mary says with a quick shake of her head. His father. Who happened to stick with the original fami ly name of Dracula. His son just thinks Drake sounds a little less pretentious and more modern.So why were you trying to kill Draculas kid, if his dad is the one who I cant even bring myself to say it. Fortunately, I dont have to.Marys shoulders are hunched. If killing his only kid doesnt get Dracula to come out of hiding so I can kill him, too, I dont know what will.Wont that be, uh kind of dangerous? I ask. I cant believe Im sitting here talking about this. But I cant believe Im in Mary-from-U.S.-Historys bedroom, either. I mean, isnt Dracula, like, the head of the whole operation?Yes, Mary says, looking down at the photo Ive laid between us. And when hes gone, Mom will finally be free.And Marys dad wont have to worry about finding a cure for vampirism anymore, I think, but dont say out loud.Why didnt Drake just, uh, turn Lila tonight? I ask. Because this has been bothering me. Among other things. I mean, back at the club?Because he likes to play with his food, Mary says emotionle ssly. Just like his dad.